Comedy Corner Underground

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alesanaxcore24: heyy

me: hi. your name looks like a porn bot name.

alesanaxcore24: hey i jus really bored annd saw you wre onIine wanna talk for a liI??

me: are you a porn bot?

alesanaxcore24: niice i was soo lonely it’s nice to have someone to talk with so what are you up to

me: eating human flesh and being honest about it

alesanaxcore24: ah cooIlIcoool i jus got back from workin out i am actually about to get to work online

me: i find that long pork goes best with KC MASTERPIECE bbq sauce

me: ONLY KC MASTERPIECE

alesanaxcore24: i’ve been doin these private shows here onIine while i’m at college wanna come pIay??

me: that depends, do you have KC MASTERPIECE?

alesanaxcore24: it is so much more fun ;) and i think i even have a free pass left i could let ya use too if you wanted

me: TELL ME WHAT BRAND OF BBQ SAUCE YOU USE YOU MALINGERING BITCH! I WILL KILL YOU SO MANY TIMES IF YOU SAY BULLSEYE OR JACK DANIELS!!!

alesanaxcore24: k lm wired thru this site to keep these irritating little aim nerds so don’t worry if you don’t have one or it doesn’t work k

me: I SWEAR TO FUCK THE NEXT WORDS OUT OF YOUR MOUTH BETTER BE KC MASTERPIECE!!!!!1!!!

alesanaxcore24: ok hunny this is gonna be soo fun just go to [Hyperlink Removed] and make sure you accept the invite on the side got it??

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Part 2 

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terann1005: hey.

me: you’re a porn bot.

terann1005: hey… did we ever chatted before?? i can never remember peoples sns

me: NO WE’VE NEVER CHATTED. YOU ARE A MACHINE. OBVIOUSLY

terann1005: i’m sorry i can be forgetful at times… whatcha doin???

me: Does this ever work?

me: Wait, let me guess

me: you jsut got back from the gym

me: showered

me: and are super horny

terann1005: oh cool i just got out of the shower .. been one of those days and i don’t know what it is but i always get a lil horny ever get like that??

me: Why don’t you get out of that towel and get sexied up?

terann1005: well…. i was about to get out of this towel and get sexied up wanna cumm watch ;-)

me: Wait wait, I got this one too. Ask me if I’m ready to have some fun or something, then mention, as a brief aside, that I have to go to this website and put in my credit card info to ‘keep the kids out.’

me: and not at all to rape my bank account like the android charlatan you are

terann1005: yayyy!!!! i been soo lonely this is gonna be so great hope you’re ready

terann1005: just go to [hyperlink removed] and click the join free button at the top of my profile .. it might take a sec to load see it????

me: you forgot the bit about kids and how the credit card thing happens

terann1005: k just fill out your info so you can make a name and join me in private

terann1005: i use this site to keep away the kids they’re really good about not allowing any minors or recording my webcam thats why you need the c.c. but it’s free to join you’ll see it says it right there

me: Little coaching, but we got through it.

me: Great job

terann1005: hurry up though sweetie i’m about to get my favorite toy so you can tell me what to do…. might wanna turn down the volume though ;) i can get pretty noisy sometimes lolz 

me: I would actually pay to see a machine jerk off with a smaller machine.

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Nate Abshire is something of an asshole, but you can find him on Facebook or Twitter.